As I'm sitting on my bed, sick with the stomach bug and playing "hooky" from work... I was cleaning up my email folders and deleting old emails. I found a bunch of pictures of myself from over the past year or so.
It shocked me.
I guess I never really noticed how full my face looks. Bloated. Chipmunk-esque.
Baby steps right? I'll get there eventually... right?
This weekend I was shopping for mother's day (nothing like putting off until the last minute, huh?) and I found a couple of shirts in the "Women's" department at Walmart. I tried one on in a size smaller than I usually wear and guess what... it fit. I mean... it fit.
To say the least... I was surprised. For the past three years, my weight has fluctuated and stayed about the same. It's been frustrating but I can honestly say I haven't been trying. Maybe I'm afraid; but of what... I'm not entirely sure. I don't know how to handle being anything other than "Fluffy". I don't know what it's like to wear cute little clothes and have people look at me. I don't know what it's like to fit into a regular pair of jeans or wear a pretty bra.
It saddens me how people and society treat over-weight people. Aren't we all humans? I have feelings... just like you. Anger, sadness, happiness, love, joy, hurt... Don't we all have hopes and dreams and fears? Don't we all desire the basic needs in life? Love? Affection? Attention? We're not as different as we think we are or have been made to think. We're all made of the same things.. blood and skin.
We're a "melting pot" culture... full of such diversity... but what does diversity REALLY mean? If you look it up on www.dictionary.com it says it's a "Variety". A variety huh? What if the world were all Stepford Wives? Cookie Cutter images? Wouldn't that make life boring?
I choose to celebrate my differences and yours. Imagine if, for one day, we ALL had to walk around with one label on us... What would yours be?
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